If you’ve been bullied at work, or recently left a toxic workplace, you are most likely in a state of shock. Even though you may feel isolated, you are not alone! Unfortunately, many people experience unfairness and disrespect at the workplace. Getting away from a harmful work situation, is a very important first step. However, more internal work is necessary to fully transform this experience, so that you can find a career path and work environment where you can thrive.

Listen to Your Body

One of my coaching clients, let’s call her Eva, hired me shortly after she had left a very toxic work situation. She was longing to find a work environment where she could feel safe and contribute with her gifts. However, Eva also realized that she wasn’t quite ready to move forward yet.  She needed time to reconnect with her confidence first.

When we began coaching, I asked Eva to notice how she was feeling and what she was sensing in her body while working in her previous job. Eva experienced a lot of tension in her neck and tightness in her stomach. She felt scared and helpless. I asked Eva to send gratitude to her neck and stomach, recognizing that they were trying to get her attention. As Eva sent gratitude, she noticed some relief and relaxation in her neck and stomach.


Take a moment now to recall a toxic situation or bullying you may have recently encountered at work and notice your body sensations and feelings. Then send your gratitude to the places that are hurting in your body. Thank your body for helping to keep you safe and communicating with you.

Tune into Your Deeper Needs

Listening to Eva, I had a hunch that this toxic workplace experience was not the first time in her life when she had felt scared and helpless. I asked Eva about an earlier time in her life when she felt that way. Eva immediately remembered being bullied in elementary school. I encouraged Eva to invite her younger self, who had just been bullied, to sit across from her. Once she felt the presence of her younger self, I invited her to tune into what her younger self needed most at that time. Eva noticed that her younger self needed support, love and understanding.

Take a moment now, to remember an earlier time in your life when you experienced toxicity or bullying. Trust that the memory that arises is the one that needs your attention. Invite the younger self to sit across from you. Notice your younger self’s presence and tune into what your younger self most needs. Does s/he need love, support, understanding, comfort, or protection? Simply notice your younger self’s needs.

As you tune into the needs of your younger self, you are really getting in touch with your current deeper needs. If you find this challenging to do by yourself, reach out for support from a career coach or counsellor. Just like Eva, you don’t have to do this alone.

Acknowledge Your Younger Self’s Needs

Once Eva had noticed her younger self’s need for support, love and understanding, I encouraged Eva to acknowledge these needs. I invited Eva to say to her younger self something like “I get it, you need to be loved, supported and understood.” Eva was tempted to give her younger self what was needed. She wanted to rush over there, hold her younger self and make her feel better.

I acknowledged Eva’s urge to fix the painful situation and encouraged her to refrain from this temptation. “Would it be alright, Eva, to simply acknowledge your younger self’s needs and stay with her in this place of pain?” I asked. Once Eva acknowledged her younger self’s needs, I asked Eva, if she noticed any shifts in the presence of her younger self. Eva was quite surprised. Her younger self seemed more relaxed and even smiled a little.


Just like Eva, you may be tempted to rescue your younger self. I encourage you to simply acknowledge your younger self’s needs instead. It takes courage and presence to be with your younger self in this way. What happens as you acknowledge your younger self’s needs? What shifts are you noticing in your younger self? Your heartfelt acknowledgements are indeed what your younger self most needs to transform.

Connect with Your Younger Self Daily

Sitting with your younger self, acknowledging her/his needs is a way of healing the part of you that didn’t get what s/he needed at the time. It is a slow, yet very empowering process. I encouraged Eva to make time for daily visits with her younger self for the next few weeks. Eva decided to make these visits part of her daily morning meditation practice.


Just like Eva, you too may want to make space in your daily life for visits with your younger self. When would be a good time for you? It’s helpful to tag these visits onto something that you are already doing daily, such as brushing your teeth or taking a shower. What time and activity will work best for you? Create a reminder for yourself, to make it easier for you to follow through with your commitment.

Explore What Career and Workplace Energize YOU

Over the following weeks, Eva’s younger self, became more and more calm and confident. As her younger self healed from the bullying experience, Eva was able to find more and more peace within and let go of the toxic workplace experience she had recently been through. She felt a readiness and excitement to look at what she truly wanted at this stage of her career. As you do this important inner work, you too may feel invigorated and ready to explore what you truly want to create at this stage of your career.


Now that you are on your way to fully transform and release the pain from the toxic workplace or bullying you experienced, take another powerful step and request your free career clarity consultation. I look forward to exploring with you what kind of career and workplace would energize and inspire YOU.